Not while I'm around
by Jubella
Summary: Quinn and Rachel will endure everything to be together, because together, it gets better. Warnings for bullying.


She hears muffled shouting through the closed door as she waits for her girlfriend to return, but she doesn't get up from the bed to see what's going on. She knows, this isn't new.

There's no questions anymore, no alarmed _what happened? _She knows she shouldn't be used to this, because it isn't normal and it isn't right, but it happens every day, everywhere. It happens to them at least once a week. Rachel's too tight shorts squeeze her thighs as she seats at the edge of the bed, droplets from her wet hair running down her neck. She would lie down, but the ache from where she hit her back with the edge of the dumpster would make it uncomfortable. Quinn wishes her girlfriend's dad would stop shouting so Rachel could come quicker with the ibuprofen and the bag of ice for her back.

_This is where you belong, with the trash, dyke._

Rachel apologizes as she enters her room, her stoic features softening at the sight of her girlfriend just out of the shower. She gives Quinn the glass of water and the pill and goes sit with her back against the pillows, puts a towel on her chest and the ice pack on top of it. The blonde scoots back and lays her back down carefully against the cold, a little hiss leaving her lips. Rachel just kisses the top of her head and turns the TV on, starts waving her fingers through short blonde hair.

_If you want to fuck girls you have to look the part, freak._

It doesn't take long before Quinn falls asleep, and Rachel takes the opportunity to grab her cellphone to ask Mercedes to tell Ms. Fabray her daughter is at the Jones home.

_They did this to you, Quinny! They contaminated you! Why do you insist on being like this? I raised you better._

_You're not allowed to see that –that girl anymore._

_If you didn't choose to act this way, no one would bully you, Quinn!_

Mercedes and Kurt ask if there's anything they can do. Rachel wonders why they still bother. Kurt could afford to go back to Dalton when Karofsky left McKinley; he's too safe now to still remember what it feels like, to truly remember the smell of dumpsters or balloons with urine. Besides, no one ever cornered him and offered to _fix _him.Rachel wraps her arms around Quinn's shoulders at the memory of what could have happened. It's the only thing that still frightens her anymore.

_You never know, maybe all you need is a little meat inside of you to realize what you're missing, babe._

It's as if she could still smell the vomit on her shirt, hear the tear of clothes, feel the relief of hearing Noah's shout. She was never glad to hear fists meet skin, just that one time.

_We can't do anything about it without proof, Ms. Berry. Certainly not on your word alone!_

They never reported anything after that. Definitely not after nothing was done with her case but Sam and Noah were suspended when they hit Azimio in the parking lot two days later.

What are a couple of insults when you walk down the hallway with your girlfriend? What's a shove to a locker? What's a lock up in the bathroom?

Coming out was never an easy decision for them. Not with Quinn's mother and upbringing, not with Rachel's family.

_Well of course you'd turn out like this, living with your faggot dads._

Her dads still beg her to transfer, but Rachel won't leave Quinn alone. Her girlfriend doesn't have the chance to leave. Rachel knows Santana wouldn't let Quinn walk the hallways alone, but it's not the same comfort Rachel can give her. Santana's protection is not the same without Dave. Quinn would be the only out student at the school if Rachel left, and just the thought of her girlfriend being there without her is painful enough. Quinn wouldn't even let Rachel go to the bathroom alone at the beginning of the year after the stall _incident._

_I bet you can't fuck your girlfriend with your fingers broken, Queerio. _

Rachel remembers the pain of her girlfriend shutting down from her, not answering her calls, not opening the door. Judy Fabray almost called the cops on her when she found out she was the cause of her daughter's three broken fingers. She still remembers the relief, the realization that she couldn't ever live without her girl, when she felt Quinn slid behind her under the sheets at three in the morning, the hard cast against her belly. That was the first night they cried together until they fell asleep.

_Good thing you gave that baby away, Fabray. God forbid she caught your cooties. That's if you didn't transfer them while she cooked inside you._

Rachel honestly though the novelty of the social outcast and the ex-Head Cheerleader dating would worn off. But some jocks and cheerleaders fed off of each other, and it just got worse. Even when Coach Sylvester kicked out two of her girls when she caught them giving Rachel a black eye, they took out their frustrations locking themselves in the locker rooms and chopping Quinn's hair. It took endless days of comfort and kisses from Rachel to convince her girlfriend she was still as gorgeous as ever, even after Tina fixed the mess.

Sometimes she wants to laugh when she thinks about how miserable she felt before, when the only thing she had to endure where slushies to the face or being called Man Hands. Quinn once told her that being shunned in elementary school was a piece of cake compared to this, but at the same time, it was different. Now she wasn't alone.

Rachel feels her girlfriend stir slightly, the bones in her back cracking as she arches, and she welcomes back her angel from her nap. Quinn merely turns around smiling to rest her cheek against her Baby's stomach, muttering a drowsy hello. They move to be face to face, chest to chest, and share soft kisses with their eyes closed.

They never doubted this was worth it. There was only a month left now before school was over and they left Lima for New York. Hands sneak under shirts to feel warmth and there's not a single cell in their bodies that regret enduring what they have to endure every day.

What's an insult, when it competes with hundreds of _'I love you'_s? What's a shove to a locker when you have a lifetime of embraces and kisses and soft touches ahead of you? What's a lock up in a bathroom when you have a place far away to escape with someone who will never leave you?

There's not a thing that can't stop Rachel from believing in her dreams. Someone once told her they were an inevitability, and she doesn't doubt it for a second, even if her dreams include something else now... A small apartment, a girlfriend to come home to, nights of passion without sleeping, a gorgeous blonde sitting in the middle of the front row at her first Broadway show. Just a few days ago, Rachel was able to add a wedding ring to that picture. Her dreams grow and are more possible every day.

Quinn knows all of this will be in the past as soon as they leave. She won't ever have to look behind, to the days where she was afraid to leave her girlfriend alone around school, never think about what she felt when she saw her tiny girl with vomit on her broken shirt. She knows they can handle this, that it makes them stronger. She knows it's not right, that they shouldn't have to put up with all this; but she also knows it'll be over soon. Not even what she goes through now compares with the inner struggle she had for years, punishing herself for thinking about a girl in a way she wasn't supposed to, trying to convince herself that it wasn't natural. Forcing herself to sleep with a boy to try and fix what was wrong inside. Physical pain she might suffer now doesn't compare to the turmoil that was her mind all those years, a commotion silenced in a second by a pair of soft lips, soft hands, sweet smell, warm body pressed against her own.

Every day, their chance at happiness is nearer, their past more behind with each passing second. They'll get by, because they can do anything together. Stay strong and fight out ghosts, heal their scars with undying love, endless devotion. Create new memories together, far away, and make their dreams become reality. Together, every day, it gets better.


End file.
